The End

About five years ago, give or take an hour, my father died. I can’t decide if I’m used to it or not yet. My father and I didn’t always get along but in spite of everything I really miss my dad. I just wanted to mark the moment.

Secondly, I will probably stop doing this blog for a while. I’m pretty sure no one is reading it, and I haven’t had the time to write anything substantial. Rather, for the summer, I plan on keeping a log of my dreams.

We’ll see what dreams may come.

Arabic lesson of the day

So, I learned a new word today: "Halal", which is basically the Muslim equivalent of Kosher. Specifically, it was referring to gyro meat in a restaurant we ate at for lunch. I just think it was interesting that they said "halal" and not "kosher", and I think it must really speak something of the demographics in the area. There is the only mosque I've ever seen in the U.S. (near the Ikea, of all places). In the New York area, where I'm from, they would probably say kosher, just based on that area's demographics.

Just an observation on changing trends in America. In case you were wondering, the gyro was delicious.

Happy Memorial Day Everybody!!!...

May God bless you, and goodnight...

Savior Is Born

Last night it was announced that Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt welcomed into the world their long-expected baby. A girl named Shiloh was born...uh, sometime. I kind of feel bad for the baby...although it is entering a life of luxury, it also has a lot to live up to. By all accounts the child (should I say "Child") should be genetically perfect. With expectations this high, the only eventuality is that they won't be met. Unless the child grows up to become a moon goddess, I think we'll all be a little disappointed. Which really isn't fair. The little girl isn't even aware of the expectations awaiting her. I guess kind of like when they find the next Dali Lama, except this child is supposed to grow into hotness rather than spirituality. I wonder how young it will be acceptable for plastic surgery patients to be soon?

Anyway, Shiloh will be 20 when I'm about 45, so I won't even be able to respectively make an un-perverted evaluation.

Saskatoon: Steaks, Fish, and Wild Game

There's plenty of room for all of God's creatures.
Right next to the mashed potatoes.

Gods and Basketball

Today I played basketball with some classmates. I am so bad, and had kept making excuses but finally went with them today. Ouch, I’m still sore. Anyway, I managed to actually score a basket during game-play. Now, in spite of that, or perhaps in relation to that, I was the worst person there. However, it was purely basketball skill related. I’m in pretty good shape. We played full court and I was as fast as anyone, and by the end when most people where huffing and puffing I could have gone much longer. However, racing to the other end of the court for an un-guarded shot is pointless if you’re just going to miss anyway.

The main difference between this and my past basketball experiences (which I think haven’t been since high school…yikes!) where that they were fun. I was somewhat non-competitive and people were giving me tips, etc., in stark contrast to, you know, how high school boys are. Then I was just a ticker to make teams official even, though practically speaking whichever I was on was effectively one short.

If I could send one message back to a younger version of myself (say elementary school) I would say “get good at basketball”. Well, maybe not that…but if it was a list that would be on there (I think I will make that list as a future entry). I don’t have NBA aspirations when I say that, not even high school JV….I just think, socially, the pecking order in middle/high school, unless things have changed since I was there, is very much determined how well you can handle a stupid ball and if you can easily put it between your legs and when you think about it that’s really stupid, but then most other aspects of high school socialization are. But I mean, jocks are always cool (yet often assholes), and that coolness translates into athleticism in non-organized play. It just turns out basketball is the soccer/football of America, it’s what the kids run to (it seems) when they want to do something physical. It there is one activity that continues to be one that I wish I was better at, it would be basketball. Fortunately, this time it was fun enough that I may just stick with it.

typo: "e" not o!!!

While performing an imaginary script-read-through in my head, I came across an imaginary typo my imaginary friend wrote:

"I really need some...sox?"

"No, I know it's supposed to be 'sex'...how could you make that mistake? 'o' and 'e' are not even near each other on the typewriter!"

So then I just kept going...

• I have dirty sox
• I used to take my sister's sox all the time
• My mom buys me all the sox I need
• I used to have lots of sox in high school, but not any more

Can you think of any others?

Pulling out random stuff just to keep this going...

If "You cannot call yourself a true Geisha until you can stop a man in his tracks with a single look", then a Geisha I am.....not...

{pst, I'm a guy!}

Random, and so much more (less)...

The website http://www.psyops.net/ generates random thoughts that others have entered. I thought it best to do a little free verse, just let whatever popped into my head flow into my fingers. I said:

"Toys are like hot dogs you don't eat"

I don't know what to make of that.

Up yours, Brokaw

Let me just say this before I get in a better mood: the “greatest generation” is all a bunch of phonies. Those cranky-old veterans like to tell how they were such a humble bunch of citizen soldiers, yet want us to continually kiss their arses (and more) while they remind us if it wasn’t for them we’d all be speaking German now. Didn’t Cincinnatus simply go back to his rice field?

Mike Wallace: Ageless

Mike Wallace is being honored tonight; after 37 years with 60 Minutes he announced his (partial) retirement. I am sure the focus will be on his journalism, however, I would like to do my own personal tribute to his DNA. Have you seen a picture of him even now? The man is 88!

In an interview (of Wallace, not by him) a few years back that I recall watching, he was asked about his "secret". Wallace claimed his wife (or one of them, I understand there have been multiple) got him on a strict diet of just nuts, grains, and fish. Sigh, is that the price of longevity?

4.0

Oh! I should have mentioned this earlier. Earlier this week, I received notice that I got, for the first time in my life, a 4.0 this semester! {pats self on the back

It wasn't my first semester of all "A"s, if you count A\"A-"s, but it's my first semester of all straight "A"s. It was one one academic achievement that has been eluding me since high school. I'm glad I stuck with grad school so I can

Admittedly, since Georgia State doesn't do "+"s or "-"s, some of those "A"s could have been "A-"s, and so at any other school I might have something less than a 4.0. It's really uncertain if I can claim unambiguous victory. Still, at least on my paper, I earned a 4.0 this semester. When I told her my momma was proud of me.

John Gibson crossed the line

On May 11th, John Gibson of Fox News said this:

…[H]alf the kids under 5 years old in this country are minorities. By far, the greatest number are Hispanic. Know what that means? Twenty-five years and the majority population is Hispanic. Why is that? Hispanics are having more kids and others, notably the ones Hispanics call gabachos — white people — are having fewer.

On May 16th, I e-mailed in this:

RE: Clarification of Recent My Word

John,

Your "clarification" of May 11th's "My Word" regarding Hispanic and non-Hispanic birth rates is unacceptable. You were able to "reclarify" only because your anti-Hispanic statements on May the 11th were subtle. You mention that you wanted non-Hispanics to catch up, yet your bigotry was apparent simply in noting that if the
catch-up did not occur we would be in a situation of a Hispanic majority,
which was clearly given negative connotations.

Sir, you have lost all of my respect.

On May 19, I then e-mailed this:

RE: Some People Purposely Misinterpret What I Say to Mount Vicious Attacks

John,

I had already written you regarding your "Procreation Not Recreation" and figured the there was nothing more to be said but your continued attempts to reconstruct what you said are pathetic and warrant further complaints.

I don't read left-wing blogs. I didn't even know about the TIME magazine piece. However, I do watch Fox News and I saw what *you* said.

Apparently in your revisionism you are playing to Islamic/Arabic-fears. What you said in "Procreation...", was that Hispanics have relatively large birth rates. If your fears were over future Arabic dominance (although this is xenophobic in itself), why not quote Arabic immigration/birth statistics?

Rather, you offered a consequentialist argument: "have more babies or suffer a Hispanic majority". If (as you currently claim) that you welcome a "brown America" then why mention within-American-ethnicities' birthrate differentials? Is America's overall birthrate declining? There will still be babies, just relatively more Hispanic babies. Your later claims to turn this into prevention measure against Sharia Law is suspect. If you concern is American, please limit the evidence you offer to be drawn from the American experience, not Europe.

Your commentary was bitter...why even mention the slang term "gabachos"? Is that to drum up anger against Hispanics?

Sir, you have lost my viewership. I only learned of this recent commentary by browsing your website this morning. I cannot read your mind to know how you intended your original piece to sound, but the out-roar is certainly evidence that it came out poorly. It is unfortunate that you view yourself as victim. While you properly offered an "apology", please realize that your words came bigoted, no editing needed.

I may just write in some more. I didn't post his "My Words", but not only are the anti-Hispanic tones bad but its worse that he's changing his story to be anti-Muslim, both because its anti-Muslim and because he's changing his story.

No Hablo Castellaño

Some time ago, I was speaking with a (Spain) Spanish girl, or rather, as it was my attempt to do it in Spanish, I only got about two sentences in. The conversation went as follows: She told me where she was from, and whereas I wanted to say “oh yeah, I’ve heard of that”, I said something to the effect of “oh yeah, I hated that”…not sure what exactly. So, “to hear” is “oir” and “hate” is “odiar”…ok, subtle difference, but consequential. She knew I messed up and wasn’t insulted, but gave me more of a snotty-European-do-you-know-what-you-just-said-you’re-obviously-wrong.

A better story a priest once told me. The verb “to look for” and the verb “f_ck” are similar in polish and some other language. This has comic implications. For example, there was a nun going around saying “I’m looking for a priest”. Well, she wasn’t quite saying that. Even His Holiness wasn’t above it…once, giving an address, John Paul II meant to say “Look for the truth!” Apparently all the Dominican brothers this priest was with that were in the know just kind of put there head in their hands when that came out.

The day I fought back

Sprint almost pulled a fast one on me. Not intentionally, but I almost got $220+ sucked away.

All day I wondered why my no one was calling. I figured my girlfriend just must be mad at me. It wasn’t until I got home that I realized that my cell phone was actually shut off by sprint. Logging on to my account, I saw that I owed $221, plus change. This morning I had tried to change plans, and figured there was some kind of glitch in the system. The first customer care representative I talked to told me although he couldn’t generate a break down of the charge, he would transfer me to someone who could, and further more that it was likely a glitch in the switching of the plans.

The lady I was transferred to told me that I had $150 worth of internet service charges, from browsing, or something like that. I told her that was absurd; I didn’t even know how to log on. She said she could tell me exactly when I was online, which included days like my birthday, where I know I had read text messaging. Could I have hit a wrong button? Was my phone in the wrong mode or something? I was pretty sure my cable company suckered me out of $113 last year so I’m not, and certainly can no longer afford to, going to go with out a fight. I offered that in four years of service I had never, ever used the internet, so something must be fishy. Still, she argued, and asked if anyone had used my phone, and I still thought it was a glitch, so I figured to end the conversation, and not pay just yet, because this needed to be challenged. I did have a little break-down, though, because this is $220 that I don’t have.

A second call revealed that in fact, it was a glitch, and simultaneously, that the second representative I spoke with was an idiot. What if I just gave up and paid? Part of me was ready to in my self-doubt. Yet, I didn’t. Today, I grew up a little. I underwent the hero’s journey and it can only give me more confidence in the future. I’ll go the distance, until I’m a stubborn, cranky old man, raising hell over any nickel that’s out of line.

Immigration

The president addressed the nation last night regarding illegal immigration last night. This has quietly become “the” issue. In his speech, there seemed to be many mentionings of illegal immigration from “many countries”, and of course he mentioned the “terrorists” that are or would be able to come in, and blah blah blah…frankly, we all know we’re just talking about poor people coming over from Mexico. Please let’s just be candid about it.

On some philosophical level I’m against illegal immigration because it’s breaking the law, but that’s just the goody-goody in me talking. I really think the law needs to be changed, but I hesitate to sound off before I know more of the details which are probably important. Why aren’t these people being let it that they have to sneak across the border? How does current immigration compare to the gold Ellis Island days? Less? The same? No one wants criminals entering the country, but other than that, I am in favor of fully opening the borders to anyone who wants to enter.

I think at least some are adverse to Mexican immigration due to semi-racism (if you want to call it that) or fear of jobs being taken. They seriously need to get over the first, especially when none of them appear to be Native American to me. Regarding the second, everything I’ve learned in school tells me the economic gains to open borders (to trade and labor) are irrefutable.

From the recent protests I think we’re already seeing the dawn of a new Hispanic power bloc in the country. I think it’s great. My favor things about this country mainly come out of its migrant nation status. This particular affair with Hispanic immigration is so much like the Irish, Italian, or Asian countries’ immigration stories of the past. I’m not a historian, but it seems that the waves of Hispanics are even relatively larger than those of past immigrants. I think they are going to wield a significant portion of political power in the next century of this country, and I’m happy for them, given the discrimination they are currently facing. So, in fifty years, when they are frustrated with this crazy old man’s broken Spanish, I hope they remember I was on their side way back when.

Southern Hospitality

I’ve been in Atlanta about nine months now. It’s certainly true that people are much friendlier here. By “here”, I mean that I’m not “there” anymore. It’s my first real time south of Washington, D.C. and west of…Washington. I had heard there was a (north) east stereotype and being outside of that I’m starting to believe it.

Well, maybe “non-friendly” isn’t the word. The way I see, people in Atlanta from what I see are much more conversationable. That is, they’re more likely to strike up a talk with total strangers. In New York, I always felt that people were generally friendly. If you needed assistance, they would help you. However, otherwise, people pretty much kept to themselves. There was always this “ice” up between strangers and no one ever wanted to break it. Maybe there are more weirdos up there, or at least the perception that there are. Would New York be a nicer place if everyone treated strangers as friends? It would certainly seem friendlier. Or, is it better to keep one’s guard up for the sake of protection?

It Atlanta, there is much less ice. Not only because by August it will be 95 every day.

Mice have mothers, too

I was catching the MARTA this morning, and just as the train was arriving, I noticed a little mouse/rat scurring about the tracks. I’ve seen mice/rats on tracks before, in Washington and New York, and I usually think what I thought today: what ever happens to those little guys? I hope they’re ok, because they’re so cute. I never know, because I always get on the train that either rolls by them or turns them into a little mouse/rat puddle.

The optimist in me thinks having lived in the subway tunnels, they know when to get out of the way, and what’s coming. They certainly look scared as the trains approach. At the least I would assume it would hurt them with there big sensitive ears, as a six car train comes to a screeching stop overhead. I do really hope they’re ok. They’re just around looking for a bite to eat, not spreading Bubonic Plague or anything like that. Today is Mother’s Day. Even mice/rats have mothers…or maybe they’re mothers themselves.

Happy Birthday!

...to me. With the help of imdb.com, here are porn stars that share my birthday (1981 births):

Becka Bratt of "The Sopornos 5"
Sunny Leone of "Alabama Jones and the Busty Crusade"
Daria Glower of "European Mail Order Brides 3"

I haven't seen any of their work (so much they've apparently accomplished with the same time on this earth), but anyway, uh, happy birthday, girls!

I'm not the only one...

Yesterday my girlfriend calls me, and literally the first thing she says is not "hello" but "It must be weird not having a chest...looking down and seeing nothing".

From a guy's perspective, I've all along felt the same way.

Life could have been burritoful

It's no secret I am a big fan of Chipotle Mexican Grill...earlier this year, the company was to offer stock, and I wanted to buy at least one share just for the symbolism of owning a piece of the company (unfortunately, I am too poor for symbolism, and anyways the stock market trading system isn't really set up for people like me).

I was flipping through the channels last night, and on some news show there was saying the CMG was a hot stock...ok, maybe my one $40ish dollar stock would be worth about $65 now, and that wouldn't quite make me rich, but it's certainly better than the bank, and if I was more richer-er I would have bought more stock and in just five months would have been riding that silver-wrapped burrito to Easy Street.

Instead, I am just a poor boy, and even eating out a Chipotle is a luxury for me. Sigh.

Self-Surgery

My TV/music-blaring neighbor and the thin walls between my apartment and that of said neighbor causes me to get a lot of use out of my ear plugs. This translates into wear and tear. At some point during the last night I suppose the tension line was crossed, and this morning my worst earplug-related fear manifested: half an earplug had broken off leaving the other half deep within my ear.

OK, that thing had to come out. Comparing the half I found in my bed with the full one I saw about half was still in there. I pulled out some tweezers and thought if I could get a hold of what was in there. After some effort, all I realized I was doing was further shredding what was in there, effectively pushing the “graspable” end back further into my ear canal.

All this mind you, was about 7am, and I was a little cranky about being up not to mind being half deaf. Could I live like this? In my frustration I contemplated it…give it a day, and see if it wasn’t bearable. I laid on the bed with my plugged ear facing down and, since gravity alone wasn’t helping, shook my head violently. All that did was give me a headache.

I thought about taking a shower in the hope of disintegrating the foam earplug, but I saw the potential pitfall of a soggy mass still lodging in my ear and now contributing to a case of pneumonia or at the least mold growing in my ear. Neither would be pleasant.

My girlfriend’s father is a surgeon involved with ears…he told me in the past every once in a while cockroaches crawl into people’s ears and become stuck. It was for certain true that I could have much worse things stuck in my ear.

I’m sure if I asked for advice my girlfriend would yell at me to go for medical attention. The problem with is that I don’t have medical insurance…but I do have a paper clip! (I had given up on the tweezers). Balancing a (reflective) mixing bowl on my shoulder, I tried to navigate into my canal, although that was impossible, because it wasn’t that the image I saw was the reverse but much more complicated because I was looking in the mirror’s reflection of the curved mixing bowl’s reflection. I knew then I would have to feel my way in. Keeping in mind was my 9th grade science teacher told me (“there’s no pain like popping your eardrum”) I proceeded carefully. Ohhh, I learned both how sensitive your ear canal is and how sharp a paperclip can be.

I remember when I first started to feel it come out…I was filled with a sense of hope. I took it slow; I didn’t want to get overly excited and botch this. Finally, it came out and I heard it the world in stereo again. All that excitement and it was just 7:15am.

The apples I ate did nothing

Oh, so the other thing I haven't done since Summer 2004 besides blog is go to the dentist. My girlfriend finally convinced me to make an appointment for this morning and I had been dreading it ever since I made it. I was pretty sure they were going to find at least a couple cavities in there, just on how long it’s been. My teeth were even starting to hurt recently, but it was only after I made the appointment. I’m pretty sure it was psychosomatic.

It’s funny how we would rather choose to live in an ignorant, yet harmful bliss.

Long story short: no cavities! I have titanium tooth enamel. My girlfriend sounded surprised when I told her.

I spent over two hours there. The panoramic X-ray machine was program and so instead I took make little x-ray pictures. #1 the assistant kept jabbing the tooth separator farther back than it should have gone, and she was about two centimeters away from me projectile vomiting my shredded wheat all over her. This was a jagged metal thing she was shoving in, and I’m pretty sure she improvised because I doubt this thing was designed to go in someone’s mouth. #2, she kept taking blurry photos so we had to redo a bunch…I took way too many X-rays to the head and I think I’m suffering some dain bramage.

My mouth is in utter pain now, because after all that the hygienist I went to is a lady who I’m pretty sure moonlights as a bouncer down in seedier areas of the city. Apparently I’ve been flossing wrong, the correct way to do it is put all of your body weight into the downstroke and try your best to saw into your gums.

The biggest pain of all was in my stomach when I went to pay…I am one of the millions of Americans without dental insurance, and this little escapade set me back $200+.

Ouch.

Back for the very first time...

Spank me, I’ve been bad. When I started this blog, I meant to update it daily…when I moved to New York, it really kinda stopped happening. Anyway, for time-capsule purposes, I would like to restart this somewhat. I am making no promises, and it may just be a matter of less postings, or shorter ones, or both.

Anyway, let me catch you up on what has happened since August, 2004:

• So, I did end up going to New York. I graduated from Columbia May 2005 (wtf?) and decieded to continue my studies to the Ph.D level (2x wtf??) so I moved down to Atlanta, GA (3x wtf?!?!?!) where am going to school now. Actually, I just finished finals of my 2nd semester last week. (omg!!!)
• I thought I was broke when I worked for the government, but now I see that I was as rich as Minos. Being a graduate student is a whole other plane of poverty.
• That’s not true. By virtue of the fact that I’m an American, I’m richer than most of the world. I’m not bragging, I’m living with a guilt of being (relatively) spoiled rotten.
• President Bush got reelected. A Yale economics Professor, Ray Fair, told me he would six weeks before the election, based on the results from his econometric model. Sometime in early 2006 the Vice President shot a 78-year old man in the face with a shotgun.
• Pope John Paul II died in 2005, and we got a new pope, Benedict XVI, a German who at one point was in the Hitler youth movement (like the rest of the country). I’m surprised the anti-Catholics haven’t played on that more, but I guess they have more sense.
• OK, so there’s this thing called an iPod now. It’s basically a portable mp3 player, except they’re everywhere. Like a cell phone, I never would have thought I needed one, but now it is an indispensable part of my life. The iPod Nano I got was in the $200 range, and so of course the only reason I have it is because it was a gift from the brothers. Also, cameras on cell phones are almost (I wanted to say “always”) a standard feature now. Who thought to put those two together? Still, I always keep mine on hand in case there’s an assassination that occurs, and I’m the one person who steps forward with my camera-phone evidence to clear the senator’s son.
• In 2004 a huge tsunami hit most points of the Indian Ocean, something over 100,000 died, mostly in Indonesia. In 2005, a hurricane (Katrina) put some parts of New Orleans under twenty feet of water!
• There still isn’t peace in the Middle East.
• Britney Spears had a baby with her sleaze-ball husband K-Fed with one on the way. Tom Cruise knocked up Joey from Dawson’s Creek, and they just had one. A good film about gay coybows got the shaft the most recent Academy Awards.
• The Red Socks finally won a World Series….so much for the curse.
• In the latest Harry Potter book, Dumbledore was killed by Snape. As far as I'm concerned, Dumbledore has been dead since Richard Harris passed. Sign. I'm guessing the literary Dumbledore comes back as a zombie.

Um, a lot of other stuff happened, but I probably should just direct you to better sources…