I don't watch professional sports. I lose out on a great deal of social currency since I can't talk about how the Red Sox are doing. Still, I prefer the hours, cumulative days - weeks? months? - of my life I'm saving.
I watch the the Super Bowl for the commercials, I'd go to baseball games only to eat hot dogs, pro basketball is probably fixed, I went to a college without a football team, I watched its basketball team only in what I considered for pay due to my pep band scholarship, golf is elitist - and boring, tennis is also elitist (though less so) - and elitist (though less so), I'm American, so soccer, cricket, rugby....well.....If I ever did I would only watch hockey for the fights, boxing is sleazy, MMA is ridiculous, almost two decades ago I came to terms with pro wrestling being fake, I'd only watch car racing for the crashes, demolition derby races don't seem to come out here, and spectators of professional video game or poker players need to seriously reexamine their lives.
I've regularly worn the apparel of teams for which I couldn't name a single player.
And with a passion I hate the smug, sportscasting analysts who, if they're not reminiscing of their past glory, are selling their product through insinuating your effeminacy if you weren't to buy in, since real men watch sports (specifically, in order: football, basketball, baseball, and sometimes hockey. Nothing else).
But I love the Olympics, and during the summer games run every four years I make up for all the sports I pass on by completely binging during its two week run. While there are some criticisms of the modern games, in general I believe they support the amateur spirit and dream of a united world. It's far more satisfying to cheer on athletes out of patriotism than to give millionaires more money. Most of all, its largely sports stripped down to their fundemental level, utterly purged of BS. No abstruse, complicated rules. See that line there? Who ever crosses it first, wins. That's it.
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