The Rape of Columbus Day

Today, July 5th, is recognized as the 4th of July for federal holiday purposes. Think about it. That’s funny. Now, I’m all for observance today; I would be brooding all day if I was at work because Independence Day and Sunday had “double-counted” yesterday. So all is well, but with this I began to think about federal holidays that are specifically (or should I say “strategically”) placed to give long weekends.

Part of me thinks that this practice cheapens the meaning of the day somewhat, as it allows (some of) us to make a selfish use of the time while simultaneously giving us an excuse to do so. Labor Day would be the exception, the essence of the day (to my knowledge) is supposed to be all about vacation. The other federal holidays, I believe, are supposed to be days of recognition, yet I feel that this is lost somewhat when we take and use the time with a self-serving purpose. With Memorial Day, we “remember” those who have fallen by taking a weekend trip to the beach, aided by the fact that we are given a long weekend to do so. We may “celebrate” Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.’s birthday on days that aren’t even his birthday with a long weekend ski trip. We “observe” holidays on the days we do
to maximize their convenience to us in vacation planning. Does it cause the reason of the day to get lost? I believe so.

I may sound like an old fogey, but many holidays seem to be losing their meaning. In “Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown”, Linus and Charlie Brown talk about the commercialization of Christmas...and that was the 60’s!!! That’s a time period many of today’s adults look back to as traditional. Linus would hang himself with his blue blanket if he saw what the holiday was like now.

St. Patrick’s Day has become an excuse to drink, Mardi Gras has become an excuse to drink, New Year’s Eve has become an excuse to drink; I don’t even know when or fully what Oktoberfest even is but I’m pretty sure deep down it was something more than an excuse to drink.

Valentine’s Day is about showing your love through the purchase of cards and chocolate. The vigil of All Saint’s Day is about bobbing for apples, hoping Carmen Electra is again this year hosting AMC’s Classic Monster Movie Marathon, and making the candy companies rich. If you consider where Halloween came from, it is leaps and bounds from that, at least in this country. I ‘m pretty sure it originally involved praying most of the night. So, we add one part Pagan rituals, 100 parts “spend money to have fun corporate influence”, and you have a holiday that isn’t a holiday unless you buy candy corn, AND YOU’D BETTER!!!!!

OK, I like Halloween. I also like candy corn (and those pumpkins...drool....), and many if not most of the non-traditional “additions” to the holidays we celebrate in America. Are these the “new and improved” version of what were once boring days of observance? Or are they holidays forever warped, the product of a leisurely and selfish, eat-drink-and-be-merry society? I’m not sure. What I do wonder is, as I take my grand-kids hover-biking over the long Columbus Day weekend, will they contemplate, “wasn’t today supposed to be about some guy that discovered something?”